christinejessel

I miss the way things used to be.. the way I used to be. Now I’m so caught up in what everyone else likes, and what everyone else wants that I don’t remember where the person I started to become way back when is.. and I really liked her. I might have some sort of multi-personality disorder.. who knows? All I know is I’m never fully myself unless I’m alone. And even then, I just hold the misery of consistently never showing who I really am. I always feel constricted and angry with myself with no one to really go to ‘cause as much as I try and explain it, I don’t think you really, fully understand me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a happy person, and I’m not one of those ‘smile when you wanna cry’ type of people—there’s some genuine happiness and optimism within me.I just always used to say that no one knew who I really was, ‘cause honestly, they don’t. But now, I don’t even know who I am.
It bugs the shit out of me.